For it is easier to build a child then to repair an adult.
Help me praise more than criticize, encourage more than nag,
Discipline, not punish, and model good behavior
Rather than simple demand it.
Help me break the habit of automatically saying "no",
When I could just as easily say "yes" and to remember
a hug given before it's asked for is ten times more valuable!
Help me ask myself, "Will this matter in 20 years"
Then enable me to let go of those things that won't,
so I can have the energy for those things that will.
Help me earn their respect as I lead life consistent
with the principles I value. Lord, give me the courage
to teach them right from wrong
and help them discover their own special destinies.
Help me to freely join in their silliness, share in their laughter,
delight in their joys and keep their confidences.
Remind me daily to draw upon your strength
to heal thier wounds and comfort their sorrows.
Most of all, Lord, help me really listen for the hidden thoughts
and needs that often lie behind their requests
and give me the key to their heart
that is may be opened wide to all life's wonders and possibilities.
Author: Audrey Jeanne Roberts
Do you need a little washing?
A little girl had been shopping with her Mom at Target. She must have been 6 years old, beautiful face an image of innocence. It was pouring outside. The kind of rain that gushes over the top of rain gutters, so much in a hurry to hit the earth it has no time to flow down the spout. We all stood there under the awning and just inside the door of the Target.
We waited, some patiently, others irritated because nature messed up their hurried day. I am always mesmerized by rainfall I got lost in the sound and sight of the heavens washing away the dirt and dust of the world. Memories of running, splashing so carefree as a child came pouring in as a welcome reprieve from the worries of my day.
The little voice was so sweet as it broke the hypnotic trance we were all caught in, "Mom, let's run through the rain," she said. "What?" Mom asked.
"Let's run through the rain!" She repeated.
"No, honey. We'll wait until it slows down a bit," Mom replied
This young child waited about another minute and repeated, "Mom, let's run through the rain."
"We'll get soaked if we do," Mom said.
"No, we won't, Mom. That's not what you said this morning," the young girl said as she tugged at her Mom's arm.
"This morning? When did I say we could run through the rain and not get wet?"
"Don't you remember? When you were talking to Daddy about his cancer, you said, "If God can get us through this, he can get us through anything!'"
The entire crowd stopped dead silent. I swear you couldn't hear anything but the rain. We all stood silently. No one came or left in the next few minutes. Mom paused and thought for a moment about what she would say. Now some would laugh it off and scold her for being silly. Some might even ignore what was said.. But this was a moment of affirmation in a young child's life. A time when innocent trust can be nurtured so that it will bloom into faith.
"Honey, you are absolutely right. Let's run through the rain. If God let's us get wet, well maybe we just needed washing," Mom said.
Then off they ran. We all stood watching, smiling and laughing as they darted past the cars and yes, through the puddles. They held their shopping bags over their heads just in case. They got soaked. But they were followed by a few who screamed and laughed like children all the way to their cars.
And yes, I did. I ran. I got wet. I needed washing.
Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away your precious memories... So, don't forget to make time and take opportunities to make memories everyday. To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven.
I HOPE YOU STILL TAKE THE TIME TO RUN THROUGH THE RAIN.
Take the time to live!!!
We waited, some patiently, others irritated because nature messed up their hurried day. I am always mesmerized by rainfall I got lost in the sound and sight of the heavens washing away the dirt and dust of the world. Memories of running, splashing so carefree as a child came pouring in as a welcome reprieve from the worries of my day.
The little voice was so sweet as it broke the hypnotic trance we were all caught in, "Mom, let's run through the rain," she said. "What?" Mom asked.
"Let's run through the rain!" She repeated.
"No, honey. We'll wait until it slows down a bit," Mom replied
This young child waited about another minute and repeated, "Mom, let's run through the rain."
"We'll get soaked if we do," Mom said.
"No, we won't, Mom. That's not what you said this morning," the young girl said as she tugged at her Mom's arm.
"This morning? When did I say we could run through the rain and not get wet?"
"Don't you remember? When you were talking to Daddy about his cancer, you said, "If God can get us through this, he can get us through anything!'"
The entire crowd stopped dead silent. I swear you couldn't hear anything but the rain. We all stood silently. No one came or left in the next few minutes. Mom paused and thought for a moment about what she would say. Now some would laugh it off and scold her for being silly. Some might even ignore what was said.. But this was a moment of affirmation in a young child's life. A time when innocent trust can be nurtured so that it will bloom into faith.
"Honey, you are absolutely right. Let's run through the rain. If God let's us get wet, well maybe we just needed washing," Mom said.
Then off they ran. We all stood watching, smiling and laughing as they darted past the cars and yes, through the puddles. They held their shopping bags over their heads just in case. They got soaked. But they were followed by a few who screamed and laughed like children all the way to their cars.
And yes, I did. I ran. I got wet. I needed washing.
Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away your precious memories... So, don't forget to make time and take opportunities to make memories everyday. To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven.
I HOPE YOU STILL TAKE THE TIME TO RUN THROUGH THE RAIN.
Take the time to live!!!
Children Learn What They Live #4
IF CHILDREN LIVE WITH PITY,
THEY LEARN TO FEEL SORRY FOR THEMSELVES.
When things aren't going well for your child, don't waste time pitying him. Instead, do everything you can to help him make the situation better.
Our confidence in our children's inner strength will help give them the faith they need to trust in and rely upon themselves. This will guide them along the road from self-pity to self-determination.
Feeling sorry for ourselves does not set a good example for our children. We have to find or create the resources we need to change our attitude.
When a project fails, encourage your child by asking, "How did you want it to turn out? Maybe there's a way I can help you do a better job next time."
We must open our hearts and teach our children to recognize a tragic situation when it occurs - then do what we can to help, and find ways they can help, too.
Disabled or even terminally ill children often teach their parents more about how to live than their parents could ever teach them.
No child needs pity. Encouragement and understanding can inspire your child and give him something to hold on to.
Your kind thoughts and words directed to a truly disabled child are just as important as the helping hand you may offer her.
When your child notices you are not feeling up to par, and says, "I'm sorry, Mommy," and pats you on the shoulder, she is showing empathy.
All of us know what it's like to miss out on an opportunity or to feel regret or disappointment. When things go wrong, help your child review what happened and figure our how she could have made different choice, so she can do better next time.
Keep off the pathway of pity with your children. Instead, take the pathway of determination.
"Poor me" is an isolating feeling. Make a special effort to connect with your child, offering warmth, appreciation, and understanding instead of pity.
Let's face it - nobody is perfect. Sometimes expecting too much too soon from our children can cause them to feel that they don't measure up.
If we hear a child saying "I can't" to often, we may want to explore in what way he needs to feel more empowered.
We want our children to understand that things don't always go the way they want them to. We hope that, rather than feeling sorry for themselves, they'll learn to see this fact of life as a challenge.
The positive outlook of those who live, work, and play with disabilities in their everyday lives can teach all of us a lot about courage, faith and hope.
No matter what the situation, pity is not a helpful attitude. Our children need our support and confidence.
It's vital for us to confront ourselves when we start feeling sorry for ourselves. At these times we need to find the strength and support we need to take positive action instead of wallowing in self-pity.
No matter how difficult things may appear in the moment, as parents we need to always maintain our most optimistic vision of our children. Remember - we are the grown-ups!
Encouragement
"I got two A's" the small boy said.
His voice was filled with glee.
His father very bluntly asked, "Why didn't you get three?"
"Mom I've got the dishes done."
The girl called from the door.
Her mother very calmly said, "Why didn't you sweep the floor?"
"I mowed the grass," the tall boy said, "and put the mower away."
His father asked him with a shrug, "Did you clean off the clay?"
The children in the house next door seem very happy and content.
The same thing happened over there, but this is how it went:
"I got two A's" the small boy said.
His voice was filled with glee.
His father proudly said, "That's great. I'm glad you belong to me."
"Mom I've got the dishes done."
The girl called from the door.
Her mother smiled and softly said, "Each day I love you more."
"I mowed the grass," the tall boy said, "and put the mower away."
His father answered with much joy, "You've made my happy day."
Children deserve a little praise
For tasks they're asked to do.
If you're to lead a happy life,
So much depeends on you.
Author unknown
His voice was filled with glee.
His father very bluntly asked, "Why didn't you get three?"
"Mom I've got the dishes done."
The girl called from the door.
Her mother very calmly said, "Why didn't you sweep the floor?"
"I mowed the grass," the tall boy said, "and put the mower away."
His father asked him with a shrug, "Did you clean off the clay?"
The children in the house next door seem very happy and content.
The same thing happened over there, but this is how it went:
"I got two A's" the small boy said.
His voice was filled with glee.
His father proudly said, "That's great. I'm glad you belong to me."
"Mom I've got the dishes done."
The girl called from the door.
Her mother smiled and softly said, "Each day I love you more."
"I mowed the grass," the tall boy said, "and put the mower away."
His father answered with much joy, "You've made my happy day."
Children deserve a little praise
For tasks they're asked to do.
If you're to lead a happy life,
So much depeends on you.
Author unknown
The Parents' Affirmation of Imperfection
It's perfectly okay for me to be imperfect.
This includes not being a perfect parent.
This means that it's okay that I have already made a lot of mistakes as a parent
and that it's okay that I will make other mistakes in the future.
What's not okay is for me to pretend
that I am perfect and to thereby hide my mistakes from myself.
Instead I will catch my mistakes with a smile rather than a kick
and learn what they have to teach me.
That way, I won't make the same mistakes too often,
and I'll never be a perfect parent and that's okay,
because my goal is excellence, not perfection.
Author unknown
This includes not being a perfect parent.
This means that it's okay that I have already made a lot of mistakes as a parent
and that it's okay that I will make other mistakes in the future.
What's not okay is for me to pretend
that I am perfect and to thereby hide my mistakes from myself.
Instead I will catch my mistakes with a smile rather than a kick
and learn what they have to teach me.
That way, I won't make the same mistakes too often,
and I'll never be a perfect parent and that's okay,
because my goal is excellence, not perfection.
Author unknown
Prescribed by the Great Physician
The next time you feel like GOD can't use you, just remember...
Noah was a drunk
Abraham was too old
Isaac was a daydreamer
Jacob was a liar
Leah was ugly
Joseph was abused
Moses had a stuttering problem
Gideon was afraid
Samson had long hair and was a womanizer
Rahab was a prostitute
Jeremiah and Timothy were too young
David had an affair and was a murderer
Elijah was suicidal
Isaiah preached naked
Jonah ran from God
Naomi was a widow
Job went bankrupt
Peter denied Christ
The Disciples fell asleep while praying
Martha worried about everything
The Samaritan woman was divorced, more than once
Zaccheus was too small
Paul was too religious
Timothy had an ulcer... AND
Lazarus was dead!
Now! No more excuses!
God can use you to your full potential..
Besides you aren't the message, you are just the messenger.
1. God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts.
2. Dear God, I have a problem, it's Me.
3. Growing old is inevitable... growing UP is optional.
4. There is no key to happiness. The door is always open.
5. Silence is often misinterpreted but never misquoted.
6. Do the math... count your blessings.
7. Faith is the ability to not panic.
8. Laugh every day, it's like inner jogging.
9. If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray, don't worry.
10. As a child of God, prayer is kind of like calling home everyday.
11. Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.
12. The most important things in your house are the people.
13. When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God wants us to be still so He can untangle the knot.
14. A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.
15. He who dies with the most toys is still dead.
If Tomorrow Starts without Me
"If tomorrow starts without me,
And I'm not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
We didn't get to say.
I know how much you love me,
As much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me,
I know you'll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
Please try to understand,
that an angel came and called my name,
And took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready,
In heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind
all those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye,
For all my life, I'd always thought,
I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much left yet to do,
it seemed almost impossible,
that I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad,
I thought of all that we shared,
And all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday,
Just even for a while,
I'd say good-bye and kiss you
and maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized,
That this could never be,
For emptiness and memories,
would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss some tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven's gates,
I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me,
From His great golden throne,
He said, "This is eternity,
And all I've promised you."
Today your life on earth is past,
but here life starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last,
and since each day is the same way,
There's no longing for the past.
So when tomorrow starts without me,
don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart "
And I'm not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
We didn't get to say.
I know how much you love me,
As much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me,
I know you'll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
Please try to understand,
that an angel came and called my name,
And took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready,
In heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind
all those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye,
For all my life, I'd always thought,
I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much left yet to do,
it seemed almost impossible,
that I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad,
I thought of all that we shared,
And all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday,
Just even for a while,
I'd say good-bye and kiss you
and maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized,
That this could never be,
For emptiness and memories,
would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss some tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven's gates,
I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me,
From His great golden throne,
He said, "This is eternity,
And all I've promised you."
Today your life on earth is past,
but here life starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last,
and since each day is the same way,
There's no longing for the past.
So when tomorrow starts without me,
don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart "
The Rain and Wipers
One rainy afternoon I was driving along one of the main streets of town, taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick. Suddenly, my daughter, Aspen, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat.
"Dad, I'm thinking of something." This announcement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while, and was now ready to expound all that her six-year-old mind had discovered.
I was eager to hear. "What are you thinking?" I asked.
"The rain!" she began, "is like sin, and the windshield wipers are like God wiping our sins away."
After the chill bumps raced up my arms I was able to respond."That's really good, Aspen." Then my curiosity broke in. How far would this little girl take this revelation?
So I asked... "Do you notice how the rain keeps on coming? What does that tell you?" Aspen didn't hesitate one moment with her answer: "We keep on sinning, and God just keeps on forgiving us."
I will always remember this whenever I turn my wipers on.
"Dad, I'm thinking of something." This announcement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while, and was now ready to expound all that her six-year-old mind had discovered.
I was eager to hear. "What are you thinking?" I asked.
"The rain!" she began, "is like sin, and the windshield wipers are like God wiping our sins away."
After the chill bumps raced up my arms I was able to respond."That's really good, Aspen." Then my curiosity broke in. How far would this little girl take this revelation?
So I asked... "Do you notice how the rain keeps on coming? What does that tell you?" Aspen didn't hesitate one moment with her answer: "We keep on sinning, and God just keeps on forgiving us."
I will always remember this whenever I turn my wipers on.
Moments in Life
There are moments in life
when you miss someone so much
that you just want to pick them
from your dreams and hug them for real!
When the door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often times we look so long at the closed door
that we don't see the one,
which has been opened for us.
Don't go for looks; they can deceive.
Don't go for wealth; even that fades away.
Go for someone who makes you smile,
because it takes only a smile to
make a dark day seem bright.
Find the one that makes your heart smile.
Dream what you want to dream;
go where you want to go;
be what you want to be,
because you have only one life
and one chance to do all the things
you want to do.
May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.
The happiest of people don't necessarily
have the best of everything;
they just make the most of
everything that comes along their way.
The brightest future will always
be based on a forgotten past;
you can't go forward in life until
you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
When you were born, you were crying
and everyone around you was smiling.
Live your life so at the end,
you're the one who is smiling and
everyone around you is crying.
Don't count the years... count the memories!
when you miss someone so much
that you just want to pick them
from your dreams and hug them for real!
When the door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often times we look so long at the closed door
that we don't see the one,
which has been opened for us.
Don't go for looks; they can deceive.
Don't go for wealth; even that fades away.
Go for someone who makes you smile,
because it takes only a smile to
make a dark day seem bright.
Find the one that makes your heart smile.
Dream what you want to dream;
go where you want to go;
be what you want to be,
because you have only one life
and one chance to do all the things
you want to do.
May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.
The happiest of people don't necessarily
have the best of everything;
they just make the most of
everything that comes along their way.
The brightest future will always
be based on a forgotten past;
you can't go forward in life until
you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
When you were born, you were crying
and everyone around you was smiling.
Live your life so at the end,
you're the one who is smiling and
everyone around you is crying.
Don't count the years... count the memories!
Children Learn What They Live #3
IF CHILDREN LIVE WITH FEAR,
THEY LEARN TO BE APPREHENSIVE.
Our children learn how to deal with their fears by observing how we deal with ours. They are the best "copycats," so let's give them a constructive example of acknowledging our concerns and findings creative solutions.
Kids don't always tell us when they're having problems. We need to take the time to ask our children how they're getting along with the other kids at school and in the neighborhood.
Fear undermines the supportive environment a child needs in order to grow, explore, and learn, leaving him with a general feeling of apprehension. We need to do what we can to bolster our children's confidence.
Find ways to help our child build confidence and certainty, and then watch her flower!
Our kids get more than enough exposure to frightening things from watching TV or movies. Monitor their viewing to minimize the development of unnecessary fears.
Vague, generalized fears are the hardest to deal with. Help your child explore how he might react in certain specific situations by having him imagine what he could do.
When fear is in the air, hug your child and let him know you are there for him. Warmth and closeness are part of feeling safe.
A fearful child needs patience and love, not a reprimand. This is true for both boys and girls.
Stay close to a fearful child, and evaluate the situation. How realistic is this fear? What approach will be the best one to guide and help her through it? Doing so not only gets her through this situation, it shows her how to calmly face other situations in the future.
One of the biggest fears children have is about losing a parent. In times of serious illness or marital separation, children need plenty of extra reassurance. Stay close and be ready to offer comfort.
Fear produces hesitancy and uncertainty - not a good recipe for being confident. Teach your children how to overcome their natural fears, and turn potentially bad experiences into good ones.
A steady diet of fearfulness leads to a hesitancy to try new things. Give your child the support she needs to be open to learning something new.
When a child is fearful, see if you can help him explore creative ways to deal with the situation. A flashlight in his bed if he's afraid of the dark or a favorite toy in his pocket when he goes off to preschool can help a lot.
Finding out whether your child's fear is realistic or imagined is one way of becoming closer to her. You may be surprised at what you learn when you ask her open-ended questions ("What is it about ___ that scare you?")
Fear does have a purpose - to protect. Help your child learn how to examine and understand her fears - and find a way to use them constructively.
Realistic fear is not to be avoided. Rather, it's an opportunity to gather resources and mobilize courage.
We want our children to be careful, not fearful. Don't use scary movies to warn them of possible dangers. Instead, give them clear instructions about how they can handle threatening situations.
In a new situation, a warm hug can pave the way for a more relaxed approach. Sometimes just knowing we understand how hard it is for them can help our children overcome hurdles.
Let your child know it's okay to feel afraid and that you're there to help him work through his fears. Your confidence that his fears can be overcome helps him find the strength he needs to do so.
When a child conquers fear, he deserves to be congratulated. Don't minimize his accomplishment, or take it for granted.
Children Learn What They Live #2
IF CHILDREN LIVE WITH HOSTILITY,
THEY LEARN TO FIGHT.
It's important to show our children that anger is not an enemy to resist, but an energy to take charge of creatively.
Build your kids us - every chance you get - rather than putting them down. They'll fell better about themselves, and so will you.
Hostility pits children on the defensive. Instead of yelling at them, help them to relax and take a second look at what happened.
If we see our child being too rough with siblings or other kids, we need to make a special effort to understand the situation. Try asking what's going on instead of only prohibiting the unacceptable behavior.
Don't let anger build. Take care of small aggravations before they grow into something big.
If you notice your child having an automatic response of anger, talk it over and ask him if he can find three other ways to feel about the person or situation at hand.
Anger is only one response on our emotional menu. A steady diet of getting angry limits us, creating high levels of tension and blocking communications within the family.
Learning to recognize when we are becoming upset is very important. Anger and hostility build from small irritations and frustrations that are pushed aside or ignored.
Take the time to visualize how you want to see your children relating to one another. Then help them do so by paying attention to what is going on and guiding them through the inevitable ups and downs of each day.
Anger is not a problem solver. It's a problem generator.
We need to accept the fact that our children have the right to feel all their feelings, including anger. It's our job as parents to help them learn how to handle these feelings.
Rather than giving in to our anger, we can listen to our children and try to understand their points of view. It's important to remember we're on the same side - their side!
As we learn how to direct our own emotional responses, it becomes easier to remain in charge of hostile feelings. This is the model we want to present to our children.
In a tense situation, asking ourselves, "How else could I handle this?" before responding or reacting helps to open up a wider range of options.
Our children are likely to face some hostility or aggression in their schools or neighborhoods. We want them to learn how to handle such situations without escalating them.
There will be times when our children will get really angry with us. We need to listen to them carefully and, if needed, apologize for any mistakes we've made.
Remember that our children are watching the way we handle disagreements and disappointments in our relationships. We want to give them an example of effective communication and resolution of our differences.
Frustration builds more easily when parents and children are tired and hungry. Plan meals and nap times carefully, and try to maintain them as best you can.
Our children can teach us a lot about how to forgive and let go of anger and hurt. Often they get over arguments more quickly than we do.
When hostility takes over, our reactions can easily escalate beyond what we originally intended. Sometimes parents need a "time-out" too - a few minutes to calm down and pull themselves together.
Children Learn What They Live #1
IF CHILDREN LIVE WITH CRITICISM,
THEY LEARN TO CONDEMN.
For the most part, our children want to please us. We can make it easier for them to do so by saying clearly what we expect from them at the outset. This may take more time, but it will help us avoid criticizing them later.
Our children are continually learning from us, whether or not we realize we are teaching them. Let's make sure the lessons they are getting from us are positive ones.
Often when we criticize our children, our purpose is to encourage them to do better. Unfortunately, they may find it difficult to understand that it's their behavior that is unacceptable, not themselves.
If we are thoughtful about how we say things, there is always a way to tell our children that we don't like what they're doing without diminishing their sense of self.
When your child, full of fear and discouragement, confides in you, "I really goofed," be sure to respond with understanding and encouragement. ("Let's see what we can do to make things right.")
Giving your child an active voice in everyday decisions helps her build a positive self-image as a competent person. This can start with small things, such as allowing your preschooler to choose her own outfits, no matter how mismatched they may be.
Nagging is a form of criticism. It's a way of saying that we don't trust our children to be responsible. It is better to set an encouraging tone.
Just as our children are continually learning from us, we can continually learn from them. Let's allow them to teach us new ways of seeing the world. This does not necessarily come naturally. We need to make a conscious effort to let go of our own ideas and to make room for theirs.
Sharing control over small issues builds trust for future negotiations over bigger issue as our children become teenagers. Hopefully, if there is mutual trust, they will be more willing to talk with us and work together to resolve problems.
Criticism is a form of rejection. Acknowledge what has been done right, and make constructive suggestions about the rest.
Try letting your children know what you want them to do or how they can make amends - and leave out the criticism.
We can let our children know what we want them to do without criticizing them. "Can you think of a nicer way to say that?" is better than "Don't be rude!" and gives the child a chance to succeed rather than fail.
The younger the child, the more we need to stand by to see how she's doing and spot the potential problems. Help your child get off to a good start by giving her support and positive suggestions as she ventures into the world. A couple of extra minutes spend reading or playing with her before you leave her at the day-care center can mean a lot to her.
Being criticized doesn't feel good. Let's help our kids feel good about themselves even when they've done something wrong, by expressing our confidence that they can do better.
Few of us learn from criticism. Find constructive ways to help your children learn from their mistakes. Offering a paper towel to a child who has spilled something teaches him important practical skills while preserving his dignity.
Rather than being critical, be generous and positive with your suggestions. ("Let's try this..." "You might want to..." "Have you thought of...?" "Why not wait awhile and then try starting over?")
Most children will take criticism to heart unless we make it clear to them that they are okay, but what they're doing is not. Giving them suggestions for more acceptable behavior can help keep this message clear.
Before rushing in with criticism, try to see the whole picture from your child's point of view. She may have an entirely different way of looking at it. Give her the chance to explain it to you.
When things go wrong, our first, automatic reaction may be to criticize, but we have the power to pause and decide how we can respond more constructively.
A woman should have...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... one old love she can imagine going back to, and one who reminds her how far she has come...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a youth she's content to leave behind...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a set of screwdrivers, cordless drill, and a black lace bra...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family..
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored..
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a feeling of control over her destiny...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to fall in love without losing herself...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship... and how to change a tire!!!!!!!
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... when to try harder... and when to walk away...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. or a charming inn in the woods... when her soul needs soothing...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she can and can't accomplish in a day.. a month...and a year...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a youth she's content to leave behind...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a set of screwdrivers, cordless drill, and a black lace bra...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family..
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored..
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a feeling of control over her destiny...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to fall in love without losing herself...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship... and how to change a tire!!!!!!!
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... when to try harder... and when to walk away...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. or a charming inn in the woods... when her soul needs soothing...
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... what she can and can't accomplish in a day.. a month...and a year...
Top 10 good things about smiling
- It's less work than frowning.
- It's free, legal, and nonfattening.
- It shows off all that expensive dental work.
- It makes you look innocent.
- It gives your mouth something to do when you're not eating or talking.
- It's so distracting, no one notices you dressed in the dark.
- It helps you look like the "after" picture instead of the "before" picture.
- It makes everyone wonder what you've been up to.
- It can make you look scary and unstable so people won't mess with you.
- It gives you those cute little dimples that no one can resist.
T I M E
I had too much to do.
I had to hurry and get to work
For bills would soon be due.
So I knelt and said a hurried prayer,
And jumped up off my knees.
My Christian duty was now done
My soul could rest at ease...
All day long I had no time
To spread a word of cheer
No time to speak of Christ to friends,
They'd laugh at me I'd fear.
No time, no time, too much to do,
That was my constant cry,
No time to give to souls in need
But at last the time, the time to die.
I went before the Lord,
I came, I stood with downcast eyes.
For in his hands God held a book;
It was the book of life.
God looked into his book and said
"Your name I cannot find
I once was going to write it down...
But never found the time."
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